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Pride and Prejudice 2019


"Making Rainbow Magic" by Wendy Andrew

"Making Rainbow Magic" by Wendy Andrew

It's June 21, 2019. For those of you in the know, that means LGBTQ+ Pride Month has been in full swing for 21 days. Now, far be it from me to tell you what that should mean to you or how that should make you feel. You do you. If you're LGBTQ+ and/or an ally feel free to party down, quietly reflect at home, or gather with your friends and loved ones to honor and celebrate each other and the progress that has been made towards equality. It's been an insanely long battle and the fight continues. Support each other and never once let up - not while politicians and preachers are still posturing, not while bigots feel free to make threats, not while public officials push policies to invalidate or criminalize consensual adult loving relationships, not while suicide rates among LGBTQ+ people remain so high. Don't Give Up.


If you're not LGBTQ+ and/or an ally... I don't know what to tell you, have a nice summer and try not to be part of the problem? I mean, I get it. That which we aren't familiar with personally can be confusing and possibly scary. Some people struggle with acknowledging different perspectives and ways of being, it can be hard to do. Other people have been told that certain "lifestyles and behaviors" go against their religious beliefs, and, gosh, who wants to tempt the wrath of an almighty (and apparently super-judgey) God, right? (Also, what excuse could be handier for validating your own biases created by a lack of understanding or ability to let go of issues that have absolutely Nothing to do with you personally, right? But I digress.)


If you've never...

Let go of a loved one's hand in case somebody else noticed.

Looked around to make sure nobody was watching before kissing somebody goodbye.

Had to be intentionally vague when talking about a significant other.

Chosen your words carefully to keep people from finding out personal details of your life.

Acted, talked, or dressed a certain way to keep people from assuming things about you.

Feared that failing to do any of the above might put you or a loved one in danger.

Struggled with finding the right words to tell your friends or family who you are.

Avoided seeking out a relationship because it's safer and less controversial than staying single.

Worried whether or not you were safe in your home after telling somebody who you actually are.

Had your home or property vandalized with "Fag" "Homo" "Queer" "Burn in Hell" "Dyke" or equally "colorful" or aggressive language.

Been singled out by a community leader (i.e. - preacher or politician) as somebody who should be killed or imprisoned for your orientation or gender identity.

Been harassed at work or in public, or had your job and/or housing threatened because of your orientation or gender identity.

Lost friends or been rejected by your own family for coming out.

Been told repeatedly that you're going to hell for who you love.

Been the target of an inflammatory joke or comment made by someone trying to get you to out yourself to them.

Been told that who you are is just a phase or that you just haven't met the right person yet.

Felt alone and isolated because you're the only LGBTQ+ person that you know (or the ones that you do know live far away).

Considered suicide a better alternative than struggling with any or all of the above issues in addition to the standard challenges of life.


...then you won't understand Pride. If you've never experienced these things or cared about somebody that has, it probably doesn't make a lot of sense. Parades and parties and rainbow-covered everything? What's the point? The point is, we're still here. The point is, in spite of everything, we're alive, we're fighting for our rights, and we're standing up for the people who still can't stand up for themselves. The point is, we won't be made invisible, or silenced, or talked down to. We won't be erased or invalidated or criminalized. We won't disappear and we won't go down without a fight. We have Pride because we refuse to live with other people's shame.


Why isn't there a "straight pride," Jim Bob? Because every day is Pride for you. Unless you've been in a (racially) mixed relationship, I doubt very much that you've experienced any of the things described above just because of who you love or are attracted to. The world is designed exactly for people like you. Nobody thinks twice about you being on a date. Nobody questions your right to marry or start a family. Nobody threatens your life and wellbeing because of your orientation or gender identity. Nobody watches which bathroom you go into because they assume you're in the right one. You are the "normal" that everybody is expecting from the rest of us, Jimbo, and you should be thankful that you don't NEED a f***ing awareness month to promote the right for you to just be who you are. If you really think Pride is about being validated for getting laid, might I suggest a sportsbar pretty much any day of the week?


You may be wondering what any of this has to do with writing or my books. The fact is, I have LGBTQ+ characters in my books and I do so intentionally and without apology. I don't feel the need to hide them or vague them up until after my readership hits the millions and there's a multi-million dollar movie deal already in the works. (I'm sorry, Dumble-who?) I have friends and family who are LGBTQ+. I, myself, am LGBTQ+. As such, Pride matters to me, and therefore it matters to my writing. I don't do the parades, the shows, the crowds, the half-naked people dancing in the streets, drag queens on stilts, fetish gear on display, people openly making out to prove a point. It's not my thing. Neither is Mardi Gras, which...hold on... WAIT JUST A F***ING MINUTE, JIMBO. You've got your straight pride parade, so sit yourself down and shut the f*** up about it already!


Anyway, Pride is important and I respect the hell out of it even if it isn't my cup of tea. I mean, people, crowds, June heat, noise, loud music... mmm, no. But y'all have a great time! Party like your life depends on it, because it still does.


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